Don assures everyone there is a really bizarre show lined up for today. He explains how ACE Broadcasting is laying down the law and asking the guys to consider a replacement for Perry.
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Terrifying Tim and Guillermo of Jimmy Kimmel Live are on hand to try out for the part. What follows is a series of complicated questions and awkward moments as each candidate tries their best to impress Don and Mole. They also get one of Perry’s close friends on the line to tell the truth about her relationship to Perry.
After a three-way round of Mole Play, each contestant attempts their own version of Perry’s Corner, and of course their own Big 3 chant.
Keep tuning in, and be sure to check out Don Barris at the Comedy Store, now performing every night.
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Show Credits
Executive Producer: Donny Misraje
Producer: Don Barris
Associate Producer: Brian Meyer
Show Summary: Matt Fondiler
Web Engineering: Sandy Ganz
Are you guys accepting other applicants to replace the unprofessional Gary Caramello?
BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG THR33!!!!!!!!!!
EWWWW EWWWW OH OH OH!!!!
Will you have international tryouts?
I vote for Terrifying Tim. He makes Scary Perry look like Startling Stan. The levels of unprofessionalism on Perry’s part reached an all time high this week. A truly disgusting display of unprofessionalism, the likes of which haven’t been seen in any form of media in our planet’s history. Embarrassing, Perry. Epically so.
you guys should keep ferry keravelo
I think Perry should be replaced by a Sam Kinison album, the jokes would be more fresh.
God this episode is gold. The TT speech crying in the Boston ascent was brilliant.
What is a Boston “ascent”?
Haven’t you heard? Boston Ascent is the company that makes the garbage bag jackets.
….very popular with the Irish laddies there.
Actually, I’m liking Guillermo. He seems to be dedicated and a hard worker.
Terrifying Tim would be an excellent replacement. But, as far as that Guillermo goes, frankly, he sucks. Honestly, he should be replaced on JKL. Uncle Frank is only about 1 million times funnier because he doesn’t “realize” the jokes, while Guillermo has become “smart” and you can obviously/painfully tell that he is going along with the joke other than BEING the joke. In short, Guillermo sucks.
BIG TIME!
My vote (not that it counts):
#1 Guillermo – his personality and Mexican background brings a fun and interesting feel to the show. He wouldn’t have to try hard and yet he’d add a lot of character to the Big Three. Plus, Guillermo is a funny guy on Jimmy Kimmel Live. Who cares if he didn’t have a great audition? An audition doesn’t say much about a person because an interesting person (such as the Aceman) can give a terrible audition whereas an average person can give an fantastic audition. (Which brings me to Terrifying Tim….)
#2 Terrifying Tim – his audition was great but adding a third white dude wouldn’t bring much variety to the Big Three. He’d have to try hard every podcast to stand out. He seems like a regular guy who’s trying hard to get a spot on the podcast. With the exception of his audition, he wasn’t particularly funny nor did he have an interesting personality – he’s an average guy. Also, when he started “misting” at the end of the podcast, I lost a bit of respect for him. He’s got to man up. It’s uncomfortable when men get emotional and weepy. Overall, Tim wasn’t terrible – he was average.
#3 Perry – occasionally he’s funny but he’s too difficult to control. Unfortunately, even when he’s on his best behaviour, he’s barely professional. I just see Perry constantly being a constant pain, with Don frequently yelling at Perry to behave; I don’t think Perry will ever straighten up. I feel bad for the guy because he’s got a lot of problems (behavioral, financial, etc.), but he’s too much of a problem for the podcast.
Parry Caravella has ruined Victoria Givens for me. And everyone else, too.
I think this show would be a lot better with Terrifying Tim and/or Guillermo. Scarry Parry has been treading water since he made the big time. The broke motherfucker.
No contest: Terrifying Tim wins every time!
the garbage bag leather jacket cracks my shit up
OOO OOO Terrible Tim! Can’t wait for you to come back!
Oops! Sorry Terrifying Tim! Not a freudian slip! I swear.
I’ve listened to this podcast at least 6 times, not counting all the times I rewound the best parts. Perry and Terrifying Tim OOOOOing at each other makes me cry laughing!!!
I can’t even count how many times I listened to Terrifying Tim’s crying part. He is a tough SOB, he was just a little misty… theres a difference!
GREAT SHOW GUY’S.PERRY’S THE MAN BUT TRY NOT TO GET YOURSELF KICKED OFF YOUR OWN SHOW YOU KNUCKLEHEAD.
Go away, you brainless, capslock-ian fool. It’s not HIS show anyways. Barris is the producer.
I want to thank the Big Three: Dan, Mole and whomever will fill the 3rd seat for being responsible to me getting stared on a daily basis during my SkyTrain rides high above Bangkok. You brighten my day with mass hysteria. Also, if Perry does stay on, he won’t have a problem dating 15 year-olds here- boy or girl. Whatever he’s into, that’s fine; just as long as he stays away from my wife’s family.
Wow! Perry’s really stepping up here. He’d better show a bit more class and professionalism if he wants to keep his place. Terrifying Tim! Oooh oooh! He is magnificent! Still really looking forward to seeing The Big 3 Exercise video.
Hey guys,dump the racist A-Hole Perry and hire that Mexican Monkey.
As the President of Show Business, I am compelled to inform this podcast that all of you are in fact not adhering to the Bylaws of Entertainment (est. 1972). Those bylaws state, and I quote, “In no way shape or form shall an Entertainer be forced to compete on live broadcast for his/her official position as designated especially under the 2 decades rule of ownership of said position without the presence of designated arbitrator as voted upon by a two thirds majority of players in said performance or by a 100% majority in the case of reality performance (Jeff Probst ruling circa 2003). By default, Harry Paravelo is hereby granted ownership of his position for life, or until he is judged mentally incompetent, whichever shall come first.
Please address all questions to my office @ 111 Hollywood, Hollywood, CA.
I’m Jeff Klutzinberg (no relation to Katzenberg of Dreamworks, or Katman as we call him), a casting director at New Line. I just found out that Mr. Karavello starred as, “demon,” in our smash hit 2000 Adam Sandler film, “Little Nicky.” As a result, I’d like to cast him in a new picture we’re in pre-production for, simply titled, “Unnamed Dragon Movie featuring a Barbarian Who Wears a Garbage Bag for the Duration of the Film.” A bit lengthy, yes, but we’ll have that shortened once the film nears its release.
Obviously, Jerry would be cast in the starring role for the film, if it’s of interest. If Mr. Barris, Mr. Caramello, or Sir Mole could get back to me, I’d be glad to divulge further.
Jeffery Klutzinberg
New Line Cinema
The only person wearing a garbage bag is you, Terrifying Tim!
We here at Goldstein Films are thrilled to tentatively offer “Scary” Perry Karamello the lead role in our upcoming drama “Tears of a Fat Clown II: Fatty Gets Revenge” However, we feel Mr. Karamello’s artistic integrity will be greatly damaged if he takes part in the New Line Cinema Garbage Bag movie that is getting so much buzz lately. If need be, we are willing to outbid New Line Cinema for Mr. Karamello’s acting talents. Our pockets are quite deep here at Goldstein Films, and we are prepared to offer Mr. Karamello up to and including $50,000 for his acting services in our film.
Filming starts the day after Christmas, so Mr. Karamello’s immediate response is required.
Tevye T. Goldstein
Assistant President of Goldstein Films
Newark, New Jersey Branch
Perry gay-hazing Andy Dick = Strike 1
Perry throwing a mic at Saul Steinbergowitzgreenbaum = Strike 2
Perry calling Guillermo a monkey = Strike 3
…and you know what happens when you get three strikes, Mole???
“OOHHHH. UUHHHHMMM. DON’T TELL ME!! AHHHHHH. ERRRRR. YOU KNOW…. WITH THE GUY. Three strikes and … you did it, now!”
stupid perry, he always screws things up for himself!
they must make it to video!!
You guys need to give Kerry a break, alright?
Great time to buy an air hockey table!!!
Tevye Goldstein, you must remember to offer double, because that fruit Perry only does GAY SHIT.
Barry Carmelo might be interested to know that Ziploc came out with a new line of jackets. Food for thought….
U mean he might be “GLAD”
I need more Big 3 once a week is not enough or atleast 2 hour shows!!!
I keeps listening to this over and over. It’s so fucking funny!
Perry: “oh oh oooooh… are you gay?”
Tim: “oh oh oooooh… I don’t knoooow yet!”
So do we get a new episode tomorrow?
Best Christmas ever!!!!!!!!!1!!!!one!!!
Guillermo is a horrible actor. Good thing Perry is clueless.
Can’t wait to hear the show from his apartment!